Monday, October 31, 2016

5 Questions Every Woman Should Ask Before She Gets In Too Deep

No. 1: What Are Your Short-Term Goals?

If you're going to get into a relationship with a man, you should know what his plans are and how they fit into the key elements that make a man—who he is, what he does, and how much he makes. These three things, as I've already told you, are extremely important to any mature, grown man, and you have every right to know what he's doing right now, and what he's planning over the next three to five years, to be the real, grown man he wants to be. His answer also will help you determine whether you want to be a part of that plan or not. You'll know to throw up your much-needed red flag if he doesn't have a plan at all.

No. 2: What Are Your Long-Term Goals?

Trust me on this: a man who really has a vision for where he wants to see himself in ten years has looked into his future and seriously considered what it'll take for him to get there. It means he has foresight, and he's plotting out the steps to his future. If he says something silly like "I'm just trying to make it day by day," run. If his long-term plan is the same as his short-term plan, get out. Immediately. Because his answer tells you that he hasn't thought his life through, or he doesn't see you in it and so he has no reason to divulge the details to you. All he's got for you is game.
The man you should consider spending a little time on is the one who has a plan—a well-thought-out plan that you can see yourself in. Because please believe me when I tell you—and like I told you in an earlier chapter—a man always has a plan.

No. 3: What Are Your Views on Relationships?

Now this one is a multiple-part question that sizes up how a man feels about a gamut of relationships—from how he feels about his parents and kids to his connection with God. Each answer will reveal a lot more about him—whether he's serious about commitment, the kind of household in which he was raised, what kind of father and husband he might be, whether he knows the Lord, all of that. And the only way you'll find out the answers to these questions is to ask. Do it before you kiss this man, maybe even before you agree to go on a date with him—this is a great phone conversation, for sure. And don't be shy or nervous about asking these questions, either, because what are you supposed to be doing with this man if not talking to him? If he has a problem talking about this right here, then something's wrong. Run.
First, find out how he feels about family. What are his views on it? Does he want a family? How does he feel about children? If you have a child, tell your man about him or her—it's his business to know, but more important, it's your business to find out if he sees himself being a father. If he doesn't want kids and you do, then you can stop all of this right now. 

No. 4: What Do You Think About Me?

Now, this one you'll have to ask after a few dates, because he's going to need time to get to know you. But his answer will be critical because it will reveal to you what his plans for you are. If you've been out on a couple of dates and you've had lots of conversation, you know something about him, but what's more important, you want to know what he is thinking about you. You have a right to know. Oh, trust me, he thought some¬thing about you when he first walked up to you, and you need to know what it is. He was attracted to something—he liked your hair, your eyes, your legs, your outfit. He didn't walk over there just to be walking.

No. 5: How Do You Feel About Me?

Now this is not to be confused with what do you "think" about me—"think" and "feel" are two wholly different things. And if a man cannot tell you how he feels about you after a month of dating, it's because he doesn't feel anything for you—he just wants something. Ask a man how he feels about you, and he's going to get confused and nervous: "I told you before—I think you're . . ." he begins. You cut him right off and say, "No, no, I want to know how you feel about me." He might shift in his chair, scratch his head, light a cigar—any¬thing to get out of giving you an answer or thinking of what he thinks you want him to say. But you'll have to get him to answer it.
What you're looking for in his answer is something like this: "When I don't see you, I miss talking to you, I always wonder what you're doing and when¬ever you come around, I just feel better—you're the type of woman I've been trying to find." In other words, his answer has to make you feel wonderful. He may not be in love with you just yet, but he's crazy about you and he's probably thinking he wants to explore a long-term commitment with you, because when he starts to profess and put you in a position where he can provide for and protect you, he's seeing a future with you in it. And this is exactly where you want to be with this guy.

Author:Steve Harvey

Sunday, October 30, 2016

Learn how to forgive and be free...

Learning to forgive can only help you; it cannot hurt you.
Forgiveness is immensely practical and helpful. There is nothing vague, or impractical about it. Forgiveness sets you free. As you learn to forgive many problems (possibly even health problems) will gradually disappear. It will be as if you can view your life from above and can see the easiest way get to where you want to be. Life will open up in front of you. 
New opportunities will emerge as if from nowhere. Happy coincides will occur where you meet just the right person at just the right time. Ideas or answers will come to you just as you need them. A friend may make a comment, or you flip open a book or a magazine, or you may overhear a conversation which gives you just what you were looking for. Why is this so? It is because by practicing forgiveness you become more open to the goodness of life so that goodness is more able to find its way to you.
If you want to move up to the next level of financial abundance and success, Forgiveness will help you achieve it. For example, if you want more money in your life you need to make sure that you do not resent people who have more money than you. People with more money than you are the ones best placed to help you have more money too. If, as some people do, you resent “people with money” then they will not be able to help you, because you are not open to them while you are busy resenting them. Likewise, if you have a positive attitude to people who are more successful than you , they will see you as approachable and will more likely want to work with you or socialize with you.
If you want a better job, and to earn more money, then having a positive attitude towards the place you work, towards your boss, towards colleagues and towards clients or customers, helps immensely. People who have a positive, helpful attitude stand out in any situation. You can never succeed in an organisation which you do not want to succeed because you will not give of your best. If you do not give of your best, by doing the best job you can, then you will not receive the best that can come to you. Forgiveness will help you have the kind of attitude which will make you very successful at your job.
Learning to forgive yourself is vitally important too. Hurting yourself, by refusing to forgive yourself, hurts others also. If you do not forgive yourself then you will punish yourself by denying yourself the good things in life. The more you deny yourself the less you have to give. The less you have to give the less you can benefit those around you. When you stop limiting what you receive then you stop limiting what you can give. Everyone benefits when you forgive yourself as you then allow more good into your life, and have a lot more to share.
When you forgive; you become a better husband or wife, you become a better student or teacher, you become a better employer or employee and you become a better parent or child. When you forgive you are more open to success in whatever ways are meaningful to you. As you learn to forgive, what seemed impossible not only becomes possible but can even become easily achievable.

The Four Steps to Forgiveness:

Step 1: State who you need to forgive and for what.

Step 2: Acknowledge how you currently feel about the situation. This is best if it is your honest gut feelings, not the nice, polite or politically correct version.

Step 3: State the benefits you will get from forgiving. This will mainly be the opposite of what you are currently feeling. Sadness will become happiness, anger will become peace, heaviness becomes a feeling of lightness and so on. If you are not sure about the benefits just choose a few general good feelings which you would like to have for now (happier, more at ease, more confident etc).

Step 4: Commit yourself to forgiving. This is simply stating who you intend to forgive and the acknowledging the benefits which come from forgiving.
Author:William Fergus Martin

Saturday, October 29, 2016

The Value of a Smile

Scientists have been trying to figure out exactly what happens when we smile.   The results are fascinating!  Studies have found that smiling slows down the heart rate, reduces stress and can make you feel happier.  With these benefits, it is not surprising to find out that people that smile more often, also live longer!

"Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, 'I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." - Dale Carnegie

Dale Carnegie (November 24, 1888 – November 1, 1955) was an American writer and lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. Born into poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936), a bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote How to Stop Worrying and Start Living (1948), Lincoln the Unknown (1932), and several other books.
One of the core ideas in his books is that it is possible to change other people's behavior by changing one's behavior toward  them.

How can we use a smile in our everyday:

1-Build Rapport - This allows us to connect with others and we can even control a conversation with a quick smile. Bring everyone to ease.

2-Break Down Barriers - A smile can eliminate preconceived ideas and remove the doubt in someone's mind about our response. Just imagine, when we smile people engage.

3-Inspire and Give Hope - With a smile we can motivate others and show our appreciation. This inspires others and puts them in our corner.

Still not "buying" this idea of smiling?  Well, the benefits are not just health related.  There have been numerous studies that show that people are more likely to buy from sales people that are smiling.  One interesting study took this idea even further.  Researches from Central Washington University wanted to know if the genuineness of the smile had an influence on a consumer’s buying behavior.   What did they find?  When the smile was more genuine, called a Duchenne smile, consumers where more willing to buy, and pay.

The Value of a Smile
a-It costs nothing but creates much.

b-It enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give.

c-It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes lasts forever.

d-None are so rich they can get a long without it, and none are so poor but are richer for its benefits.

e-It creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in a business, and is the countersign of friends.

f-It is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and Nature's best antidote for trouble.

g-Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is no earthly good to anybody till it is given away.

h-And if in the last-minute rush of Christmas buying some of our salespeople should be too tired to give you a smile, may we ask you to leave one of yours?

i-For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give!

Author :Dale Carnegie

Friday, October 28, 2016

Top 9 Motivational Books

1)Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill I liked this book a lot. It changed the way of my thoughts. “You are the master of your destiny. You can influence, direct and control your own environment. You can make your life what you want it to be.” Napoleon Hill

 2) How to Win Friends & Influence People ,  Dale CarnegieLearn the six ways to make people like you, the twelve ways to win people to your way of thinking, and the nine ways to change people without arousing resentment

 3) As a Man Thinketh , James AllenAs a Man Thinketh explains and promotes the direct connection between what we think and the direction our lives take. Allen reveals the secrets to having the most fulfilling existence possible, and it’s easier than any of us could have imagined.

 4) Don't Sweat the Small Stuff , Richard CarlsonRichard Carlson teaches us, simple strategies for living a more fulfilled and peaceful life. We can all learn to put things in perspective, and by making the small daily changes he suggests, including surrendering to the fact that sometimes life isn't fair.

 5)The Art of Success , James Melouney James Melouney invites you to see the world differently—by walking in the shoes of 134 extraordinarily successful people. These billionaires and business gurus; sports stars and rock stars; philosophers, emperors, inventors, and saints have lived exceptional lives.

 6) The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. CoveyStephen R. Covey presents a holistic, integrated, principle-centered approach for solving personal and professional problems. Covey reveals a step-by-step pathway for living with fairness, integrity, service, and human dignity - principles that give us the security to adapt to change and the wisdom and power to take advantage of the opportunities that change creates.

 7) The Alchemist, Paulo CoelhoPaulo Coelho's enchanting novel has inspired a devoted following around the world. This story, dazzling in its powerful simplicity and inspiring wisdom, is about an Andalusian shepherd boy named Santiago who travels from his homeland in Spain to the Egyptian desert in search of a treasure buried in the Pyramids. But what starts out as a journey to find worldly goods turns into a discovery of the treasure found within. Lush, evocative, and deeply humane, the story of Santiago is an eternal testament to the transforming power of our dreams and the importance of listening to our hearts. 

8) How to Live a Positive Life, Keith H. Maitland This book gives us previously unknown information about what it takes to live a positive life. It lets us know what we've been missing and why motivation in the past has only been temporary. It will tell us -What it takes to maintain a positive attitude -How to become relaxed and positive no matter what difficulty we face -How to change negative beliefs, pattern or ways of behaving -and much more. If we wish to lead a positive life we have to learn how to master the negativity that surrounds us. 

9) Top 200 Secrets of Success, Robin S. SharmaThe book has 200 top actions to support living a more focused, relaxed and powerful life.“Sleep less, spend less, do more, live longer and be greater” R . Sharma 

Thursday, October 27, 2016


How to Win Friends and Influence People

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.

2. Give honest, sincere appreciation.

3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

4. Become genuinely interested in other people.

5. Smile.

6. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

7. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

8. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.

9. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely. In our dealings with others, building them up shows we appreciate their contribution. The bond that results can help us withstand the pressures of our own day-to-day struggles. To get an idea of the sense of pride a new employee would exhibit from being a member of your team speaks volumes about their commitment to the company vision. Find out if your new hire cares about the organization by putting a hypothetical out there.

10. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

11. Show respect for the other person’s opinion. Never say, “You’re wrong.”

12. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.

13. Begin in a friendly way.

14. Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.

15. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.

16. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.

17. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.

18. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.

19. Appeal to the nobler motives.

20. Dramatize your ideas

21. Throw down a challenge.

22. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.

23. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.

24. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person. Before criticizing the other person, call attention to your mistakes. Effectively, this allows you to call attention to another person’s mistakes indirectly. This concept also eliminates barriers and helps others to be more open to our coaching. When we acknowledge the value a person has to our organization, we establish a positive tone for open communication.

25. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.

26. Let the other person save face.

27. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.

28. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.

29. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct. Use encouragement when talking to your people. Make the fault seem easy to correct, make it seem like it’s not the first time you’ve encountered a problem, because it’s not. Mistakes are part of learning. By expressing our belief in the other person’s ability to correct the fault, we give him or her confidence to improve their performance. Another benefit is by encouraging a person’s desire to improve their performance, it develops attitudes and behaviors that are most productive.

30. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

Author:Dale Carnegie

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

I miss you...

My dear, grandmother.
The dearest person to me. It's difficult to write for  you; now you aren't with us physically .
 You have been very dear to me. You will remain a very important person in my life.
I learned a lot of things from you. You have  taught me how to love and how to fight in my life. You gave me strength and you gave me might. I remember all your advice that you gave me, to become a better person. I remember a lot of things about you. I remember your hands  when you touched my  face like  I was still a child. I can't forget your eyes, your smell when you  hugged me.

My dear grandmother, you were a very strong woman who has experienced many ups and downs in your life. When times were tough, you were stronger. But again you stayed strong till the end of your days. You know, you are a very special person for me. 

Now that the time has come for you to rest, I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. So go in peace, you’ve earned your sleep. Your love in my  heart, I will  eternally keep. Every time I look at the sky and I know that you are somewhere in the sky taking care of me.  Rest  in peace and quiet now. I wish  your soul find peace . Thanks for everything you have done for me. My love for you never dies.
 I love you ...

Grandmother Poem

I was thinking of love, and you came to mind.
I have many memories I would like to rewind.

Do you remember those days I would lie in your lap
As you doodled my ears, I would take a short nap.

I'm remembering the nights that we spent together.
You would scratch my back gently, ever so tender.

As I rewind a bit more, I am seeing much fun.
I'm remembering the fall and all the raking we had done.

So many leaves piled by the tree,
You would cover me up till I couldn't see.

Those are just a few of the memories I have.
Let's rewind a bit more to when I was bad.

I'm sorry for the times when I made you cry.
Looking back at the past, I'm not sure I know why.

I know as a child I was stubborn, selfish, and strange,
But look at me now, and how much I've changed.

I assume looking back, it's hard to understand
That today I'm quite normal, I think God lent a hand.

The ending is near, I think I've said enough!
I could go on forever, but ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

All joking aside, I would be up all night
If I continued this poem and continued to write.

There are just not enough words to express all the love
Other than the words written above.

So I thank you!
From the bottom of my heart for loving me no matter what.

By: April Johnson             

Gjyshja ime e shtrenjtë . Personi më i  dashur për mua . E kam pak të vështir të shkruaj për ty ,tani që nuk je më mes nesh. Ajo që le mbrapa janë  kujtimet e bukura dhe dashurinë e pakusht që më dhuroje. Ti ke qënë dhe do të mbetesh një njeri shumë  i dashur dhe i rëndësishëm në jetën time. Nga ty kam mësuar shumë gjëra . 

Gjyshja ime, e shtrenjta ime, ti ishe nje  grua shumë e fortë që kalove  shumë vështirësi në jetë .Por përsëri qëndrove e fortë  deri në fundë të ditëve të tua. Nga ty më kujtohen shumë gjëra. Kujtoj duart  e tua  delikate   e të rrudhosuar nga mosha kur më përkëdhelje fytyrën sikur unë akoma të isha një fëmijë. Kujtoj thinjat e tua  të arta që tregonin  vitet që mbaje mbi supet. Nuk mund të harroj sytë e tu të mencur e plot dashuri,aromën tënde kur të përqafoja dhe cdo bisedë e këshillë që më jepje për t’u bërë njeri më i mirë.

Ta dish, ti je një njeri shumë i vecantë për mua. Më kujtohet cdo gjë nga ty. Edhe pse sot nuk je mes nesh për mua ti jeton akoma dhe do jetosh gjithmonën  brenda në zemrën time . Dashuria ime për ty  jeton dhe nuk shuhet kurrë .Më mungon shumë . Ta dish se të dua shumë e do të kujtoj gjithmonë si një gjyshe që falte vec dashuri dhe ngrohtësi. Do të kujtoj dashurin tënde të sinqertë dhe përkujdesjen që më jepje .

Sa herë vështroj qiellin e di që ti je diku aty lartë ,duke më ruajtur e duke u kujdesur për mua .Qofsh në paqe dhe qetësi tani. Shpirti yt u prefte i qetë. Faleminderit për gjithcka që ke bërë për mua.

Të dua ...

Monday, October 24, 2016

Take control of your mind...

It's very important to be a positive person. An  optimist person faces every situation that happens in his life with strength . Life is too short to waste   time being  sad, jealous, pessimist, and angry.  Being an optimist and enthusiastic person iimportant for your physical and mental health. Good things come from the enthusiasm. If you keep a positive attitude towards the problems they disappear spontaneously.

You just have positive thoughts and negative thoughts . It's your choice. Positive thoughts generate positive feelings and attract positive life experiences. If you  let problems to pass without affected you, you are a person with a lot of spiritual strength. How you react to problems and challenges in your life tell much about your personality and your character. A strong personality  gives solutions of all the problems in a quick and efficient way and treats them as a normal and necessary thing in his life. He knows how to face life's challenges in the optimistic and brave way.

When our mind is clear and calm all the decisions that we take are worthy. A healthy mind thinks in a rational and correct way, analyzing  things and gives the right answer in every  situation. The thoughts  you have  in your mind decides the progress of your life. Start taking  control of   your thoughts. Take control of  your mind.

Kelsang Gyatso advices:

1-“Without inner peace, outer peace is impossible. We all wish for world peace, but world peace will never be acheived unless we first establish peace within our own minds. We can send so-called 'peacekeeping forces' into areas of conflict, but peace cannot be oppossed from the outside with guns. Only by creating peace within our own mind and helping others to do the same can we hope to achieve peace in this world.”

2-“Normally we divide the external world into that which we consider to be good or valuable, bad or worthless, or neither. Most of the time these discriminations are incorrect or have little meaning. For example, our habitual way of categorizing people as friends, enemies, and strangers depending on how they make us feel is both incorrect and a great obstacle to developing impartial love for all living beings. Rather than holding so tightly to our discriminations of the external world, it would be much more beneficial if we learned to discriminate between valuable and worthless states of mind.”

3-“The path to enlightenment is really very simple - all we need to do is stop cherishing ourself and learn to cherish others. All other spiritual realisations will naturally follow from this.”

4-“Although we want to be happy all the time we do not know how to do this, and we are always destroying our own happiness by developing anger, negative views and negative intentions. We are always trying to escape from problems, even in our dreams, but we do not know how to liberate ourself from suffering and problems. Because we do not understand the real nature of things, we are always creating our own suffering and problems by performing inappropriate or non-virtuous actions.”

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Happy girls are the prettiest girls...

#You educate a man; you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.Brigham Young 

#Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.                  Robert A. Heinlein 

#Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.Nora Ephron 

#Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another steppingstone to greatness.
Oprah Winfrey

#A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.
Coco Chanel

#Women are made to be loved, not understood.
Oscar Wilde

#If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.Margaret Thatcher

#I guess at the end of the day, all women like to be appreciated and treated with respect and kindness.Sofia Vergara

#All little girls should be told they are pretty, even if they aren't.Marilyn Monroe 

#Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.Anne Frank 

#It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness. Leo Tolstoy

#Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. Confucius

#I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles. Audrey Hepburn

#At the end of the day, life is about being happy being who you are, and I feel like we are so blessed to have the support system and the best family to really just support each other no matter what we're going through. Kim Kardashian

#Stay positive and happy. Work hard and don't give up hope. Be open to criticism and keep learning. Surround yourself with happy, warm and genuine people. Tena Desae

#Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don't wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Think how really precious is the time you have to spend, whether it's at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.  Earl Nightingale

#Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties. Helen Keller

#There are lots of people I admire and respect, but I don't necessarily want to be like them. I'm too happy being myself. James D'arcy

#Perfect happiness is a beautiful sunset, the giggle of a grandchild, the first snowfall. It's the little things that make happy moments, not the grand events. Joy comes in sips, not gulps. Sharon Draper

#I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition. Martha Washington

#The glory is being happy. The glory is not winning here or winning there. The glory is enjoying practicing, enjoy every day, enjoying to work hard, trying to be a better player than before. Rafael Nadal